When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

In the beginning of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Common issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas it is a sobering name to motion, there isn’t any denying that sober curiosity has elevated lately. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and analyzing their relationship with alcohol.

Final yr in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. Right now we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however actually not the questions on what we will do if we’re serious about a sober (fully alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we method ingesting as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I feel it’s a really private resolution, however in the event you’re any type of a daily drinker (that means three or 4 nights every week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the way in which you are feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other method. Should you’re not ingesting through the week, however then ingesting a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the possibility to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her guide, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of selection for no less than 4 weeks offers clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely is just not potential whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you don’t have any thought how shitty you actually really feel if you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you are feeling shitty. It often takes a number of weeks to your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there concerns/greatest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually relies on what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to simply see in the event you might make it with out ingesting for 30 days? Or had been you searching for actual well being advantages? Or did you understand that your ingesting has elevated over the previous few years and you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is de facto what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. Should you spend plenty of time bargaining with your self every time alcohol is concerned, which results in plenty of “guidelines” round your ingesting, you would possibly need to take a step again.

You may not even pay attention to these guidelines. They’ve simply grow to be a part of your interior chatter. That chatter would possibly sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No ingesting earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No onerous alcohol through the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so on.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on every week evening.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The tip days of my ingesting had been full of elaborate and arcane guidelines that had been consistently shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down day by day, and that type of self-disappointment was like a continuing stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your ingesting. You would possibly simply determine that it’s not value it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this pondering “I wouldn’t have an issue with my alcohol consumption however need to take a extra aware method to what I eat/drink,” what questions needs to be explored when serious about alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round ingesting and the assumption that there are “downside drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and lifelike, mannequin to make use of in terms of speaking about alcohol is the thought of ingesting occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the thought of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The fantastic thing about this mannequin is that you simply don’t must hit any type of a all-time low earlier than you may discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to determine at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

Should you’re able to get trustworthy with the position alcohol performs in your life, I might recommend sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get inquisitive about your self, and take the time to reply truthfully. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to assume. That is about you and the one life that you’ve, and whether or not or not you desire a poisonous substance to play a task within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does ingesting align with the individual I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this state of affairs?

Tam: What if our buddies have gone again to ingesting after Dry January, however we are attempting to proceed. Do you will have options/suggestions for learn how to make this a part of my way of life with my ingesting buddies? 

Krysty: You would possibly want to seek out new buddies – haha. However, significantly, if your mates really respect and help you within the choices you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re frequently making an attempt to push you to begin ingesting once more, whining that you simply’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila received’t do any hurt, then you definately would possibly must rethink who you’re spending time with. You might want to work out for your self what you need to do with the time that you’ve, and the folks you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your pal group is closely immersed in ingesting tradition – that means most social actions revolve round alcohol – then you definately would possibly want to seek out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to interchange that Friday evening cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m essentially the most fundamental sober individual round – and I’m pleased with ingesting a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that folks have completely different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing slightly extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on hearth! There are such a lot of merchandise in the marketplace – assume flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually might go on and on. I’m frequently impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Entire Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle outlets are beginning to supply such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. Should you’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s type of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you would possibly need to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this yr and keep a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam